It is really important to me that you all watch this

Your Friday LOL

Via Wonkette.

You know what is really funny

Is when people who have never owned a dog start talking to me about how much poop I'm going to pick up as if like, oh god, poop, I'll surely die. Well, I spent one summer not so long ago walking dogs. This was a job where I picked up poop all day every day. The poop of all manner of dogs - dogs of every shape and size, some of who were larger and heavier than me! They gave us special bags for the poop and to not pick it up was to risk my very employment. So, picking up poop is perhaps not such a big deal to me as it is to other people. The main thing is you need to make sure the bags don't have holes.

Additionally, I have a very strong preference when it comes to leashes. I like a darkly colored (blue or black are the best but purple or green might be acceptable) nylon leash (or natural fiber if you can find it, but you probably can not) that is about five or six feet in length, long enough that you may wrap it around your arm a few times and still have enough left to allow the dog to walk a comfortable distance in front of you. Those zip line ones that get longer and longer as the dog pulls are total bullshit.

This thing is going to live with me for two weeks

Hey guys! This is Carmen. She's a three year old beagle mix and she's going to live with me for two weeks while her shelter has it's floor replaced. My cats have NO IDEA what is coming. Let's get ready to rumble!

Need a time machine, plz

This is a great blog, and also I love these dudes:

A gentleman of culture and refinement, is desirous (for the romance of the affair,) of corresponding with a lady who can appreciate a loving disposition and luxuriant home. Lack of money no objection whatsoever, as only a warm, unfettered heart is asked for one as good in return. Address G.D.E., Mail Station D. New-York

Hey look, tampons!

It used to be that ladies were too embarrassed to even receive feminine products in the mail on the off chance someone might see them and know their lady bizniz. Now they send you that shit unrequested like HEY THERE'S SOMETHING YOU BLEED ON IN HERE!!

This is cute

And, helpful to me in some ways.

A friend told me about taking a volume of Kant from the library and reading a sentence that went on for a page or so, at the end of which, he found, in neat tiny script, the words “You Bastard.”